So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Randomize
