i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
27 Parents Confess Shocking Secrets Their Kids Don’t Know
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
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He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n