Texts From Last Night

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  (864): View more from South Carolina

  I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen

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  (864): I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen http://tfl.nu/n18y
  Replies (34) Good night (6818) Bad night (1405)
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.

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  (715): I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win. http://tfl.nu/jyaa
  Replies (64) Good night (17239) Bad night (1525)
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  (954): View more from Florida

  like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it

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  (954): like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it http://tfl.nu/s684
  Replies (21) Good night (1617) Bad night (3093)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.

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  (609): His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me. http://tfl.nu/x400
  Replies (36) Good night (1165) Bad night (8456)
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  (506): View more from New Brunswick

  Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach

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  (506): Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach http://tfl.nu/g758
  Replies (14) Good night (754) Bad night (6736)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.

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  (720): I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like. http://tfl.nu/6yf0
  Replies (5) Good night (1551) Bad night (1069)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks

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  (443): And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks http://tfl.nu/r3ru
  Replies (5) Good night (1563) Bad night (1270)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy

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  (717): The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy http://tfl.nu/dgrf
  Replies (8) Good night (946) Bad night (2222)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.

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  (205): And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk. http://tfl.nu/k7i0
  Replies (0) Good night (1489) Bad night (550)
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?

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  (502): Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not? http://tfl.nu/b1wq
  Replies (48) Good night (5059) Bad night (1185)
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  (661): View more from California

  What a dumb baby whore.

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  (661): What a dumb baby whore. http://tfl.nu/17ck
  Replies (4) Good night (1213) Bad night (742)
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  (828): View more from North Carolina

  Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream

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  (828): Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream http://tfl.nu/n2ta
  Replies (13) Good night (2479) Bad night (488)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".

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  (920): watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro". http://tfl.nu/wzks
  Replies (9) Good night (829) Bad night (994)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.

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  (908): This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar. http://tfl.nu/pvsf
  Replies (4) Good night (1067) Bad night (431)
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  (619): View more from California

  I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.

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  (619): I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers. http://tfl.nu/goy8
  Replies (3) Good night (592) Bad night (195)

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