im six kinds of drunk right now
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize