she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
