Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
