You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
Randomize
