You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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