Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
