Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
Randomize
