yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize