I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
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