I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
