I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
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