I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
