is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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