Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
