Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Randomize
