hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Randomize