We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
In the name of friendship, Iām going to kick your children into the ocean.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
