i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
