Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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