But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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