Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Someone signed my nipple.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Randomize
