im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
operation have a gay friend backfired
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize