That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Randomize
