who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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