Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Soap is not a condiment
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Randomize
