just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
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