I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Randomize
