I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Randomize