That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.