Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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