how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
this will be a night to untag.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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