Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Randomize
