OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
