...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
Randomize
