I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
