K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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