is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
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We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
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