why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
