omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
