is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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