We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
