very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine