Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
