I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
you never un-have a 4some
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
