Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
