I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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