Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
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