I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
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